when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
