Yo dont text me then not text me
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
