we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
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