So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize
