i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
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