Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize