all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
