just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
