Apparently you make a good broom.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
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