hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
