So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize