he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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