Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
Randomize