So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Randomize
