i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
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