any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
I smell like Dick and happiness
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
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