does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Randomize
