Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
it wasn't lemon gatorade
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
