I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
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