I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
