Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
How did I end up in the pool?!
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Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
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