yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Randomize
