He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
You're earring is so big in my mouth
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Randomize
