No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
16 People Who Have Raised The Bar For Petty Revenge
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Here’s Why Hotel Photos On Travel Websites Are A Complete Hoax
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.