i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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