the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
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