Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
