i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
