The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Randomize