why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
