scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize
