is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
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