So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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