i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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