it wasn't lemon gatorade
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
