We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
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