FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Randomize
