love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I got inside last night via doggy door
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Randomize
