I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Randomize
