R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
Randomize
