What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Randomize
