the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
