You're completely useless in the revolution.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Randomize
