just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Randomize
