when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
