I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Randomize
