She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
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