If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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