The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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