i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
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