The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize